WASHINGTON D.C. – House Republican Representative Kat Cammack's recent decision to occupy a seat on the Democratic side of the chamber during the State of the Union address has sent shockwaves through the Capitol, prompting emergency bipartisan meetings and the immediate formation of a 'Cross-Aisle Contamination Prevention Task Force.'

According to an official statement from the newly formed Congressional Proximity Protocol Office (CPPO), Rep. Cammack's 'unauthorized ideological cohabitation' posed an unprecedented threat to the established norms of legislative gridlock. 'We simply cannot have members inadvertently absorbing opposing viewpoints through osmosis,' explained Dr. Elara Vance, Director of Applied Political Thermodynamics at the CPPO. 'Our preliminary models suggest a 0.03% chance of a spontaneous, cooperative legislative thought occurring if a Republican is within 10 feet of a Democrat for more than 45 minutes.'

Witnesses reported Rep. Cammack even shared a brief, non-committal nod with a Democratic colleague, an incident now under investigation by the House Ethics Committee for 'potential breaches of partisan integrity.'

'It was a harrowing experience,' confessed Rep. Bartholomew 'Barty' Grumbles (R-KY), who observed the event from a safe distance of 75 feet. 'I saw her, she saw them. For a moment, I feared she might accidentally understand their perspective on, well, anything. We can't have that kind of unpredictability.'

The CPPO has since implemented a new 'Ideological Exclusion Zone' around all members, requiring a minimum 12-foot radius of political purity. Violators face mandatory re-indoctrination sessions and a temporary ban from all bipartisan snack buffets.