WASHINGTON D.C. – A landmark piece of legislation, designed to reduce sentences for domestic violence survivors who killed their abusers, has been quietly re-evaluated and deemed 'too successful' by a bipartisan panel of legislative strategists, sources confirmed today. The law, which aimed to offer a path to freedom for those who acted in self-defense, reportedly showed a disturbing potential to actually *reduce* the prison population.

“While we appreciate the sentiment behind the legislation, initial projections indicated a 0.003% chance of a survivor actually being released,” stated Dr. Philomena Crimp, head of the Department of Incarceration Optimization. “When early data suggested that figure might climb to an alarming 0.004%, we had to intervene. We simply cannot risk such a radical shift in our correctional infrastructure.”

Critics of the law, who had initially championed its passage, now express a cautious understanding. “We wanted to help, of course,” explained Senator Mildred Finch (R-KY), “but not at the expense of a perfectly balanced penal system. What would we do with all those empty cells? It’s a slippery slope to, dare I say, *rehabilitation*.”

An anonymous source within the Bureau of Justice Statistics confirmed that the law’s primary function was always intended to be symbolic. “It was a great talking point,” the source whispered, “but actual freedom? That’s just not in the budget.”